Dear Katie, I’ve been with my bird for a year now and we get on really well. It’s great.The problem we’re having lately though is that she don’t seem too keen on sex any more. She says I please her and she enjoys it but we’re lucky to have sex once a week these days. We don’t live together and it can be quite difficult to find the time, but when the opportunity does arise she’s not interested.

Then if I mention it, it seems a chore to her, which makes me feel terrible. So then we don’t make love because I don’t want to force her into anything, and then she goes in a mood saying she’s inadequate and can’t please me. What I don’t understand is that we used to have a great sex life. I would like to try new things to keep it interesting but she takes that to mean she’s not good enough for me or not enough for me and it’s not true. Now I don’t mention it but it’s getting me down so much I don’t know what to do. It’s coming to the point where I’m thinking there’s something wrong with me wanting sex when she doesn’t, like I’m abnormal or something.

What can i do, Gareth

Katie Says

Hi Gareth, every relationship has dry patches and then it picks up again, its usually just a phase that pretty much all relationships go through and passes, hopefully yours is one of them.

I’m happy to hear that you know not to push her into anything, and as hard as it may be for you at the moment dont ever even think about it! By it i mean forcing her, obviously.

Maybe your girlfriend has some stuff on her mind, maybe shes having some trouble at the moment, maybe with family, friends, work, college, uni etc? Talk to her, ask her if shes OK with you and everything going on in her life and just make sure shes happy and your happy!

I hope everything works out great and you both erm get back on track ;)

Katie x