I am inspired to write, but I do not know what it is I am inspired to write about. Maybe the fact that the world is fucked up and nothing makes sense anymore, or maybe how life is perfect and people are just never satisfied with what they have. Either way I am inspired, right now, at this very moment, I can feel a masterpiece emerging…

You see, the way I see it, people go about their lives in one of two ways, either thinking they have no choices and that life, fate, destiny or whatever they want to call it will decide itself, no matter what we do, or alternatively, they think that every single choice they make will result in a consequence which will affect the rest of their life.

I am not writing this to give you an answer to this debate, so if that is what you hope to get from this, I suggest you stop reading now, because you will be unpleasantly disappointed. I am writing this as a result of whatever pops into my head at the time of writing, I’m not even sure it will make much sense to the rest of you, but I would rather it be down on paper, than go to waste in my head.

Whether you will find this entertaining or to say the least readable at all is beyond my current knowledge, but if you do, I am a better writer than I had anticipated.

Chapter 1: The Beauty of the Unknown

Have you ever sat somewhere or even lay somewhere, out in the open, on a sunny day when the sky is clear of grey clouds, maybe on a park bench or simply on the ground, felling the prickle of the grass on your bare arms and just, let your mind go? Let it go wherever it wants, to the ends of the perimeters of your imagination and enjoyed that single moment of freedom that you never knew was possible? If you let your mind go far enough, you might even start to believe your thoughts, however extreme or farfetched they may be, are real. This is when you know, you are completely and utterly…crazy.

But to say that you are crazy, would suggest that there is a norm. And to suggest that there is a norm, would also suggest that there is right and wrong, acceptable and unacceptable, but aren’t these things just simple rules and regulations made up by someone, somewhere, sometime, that everybody seemed to just, follow? Who’s to say what is right and wrong? Normal or crazy? Who’s to say, that the normal people aren’t the crazy ones and the crazy ones aren’t the normal ones? Confused yet? I am. This is why I write these things down, to show you what goes on in my head, these thoughts that are there, aching to come out, be set free, but can’t be, because they do not fit in with the norms, the societal guidelines of acceptable behaviour. To question all existence and power of the unknown is entirely pointless, we know all there is to know about reality and what is real, what is fiction or non-fiction, what we should believe… or do we?

Remember the time, when you were a child, and you truly believed that the clouds were made from cotton candy and that the tooth-fairy would take the tooth from underneath your pillow and replace it with a coin. How do we lose such an imagination? By being taught such things as reality, that’s how. Well there are people still out there, right now, full grown adults, who still have that imagination, and that still believe in the unknown and things that could be. I am one of these people.

Have you ever seen something, or heard something, and had an instant thought come into your mind, a thought that made you smile, but you and only you thought it, nobody else knows why there is a big grin on your face and you held back telling this thought because of how they might judge you? This is your imagination, trying to escape, trying to pull you back to how you once were; free, innocent, naive, all the things that made you happy. You should not hold this back, you should embrace it, embrace it and share it with the people you trust most, whether they judge you or not should not matter, it should not be the reason you hold your thoughts inside.

Have you ever stopped, for just a moment, and really listened to a song, listened to it in depth, analysed each word, each chord, each note, and asked yourself what it means to you? Why do you like it so much? Why do you repeat it to yourself until you know every word, every riff, and every octave change until you can replay it in your mind anytime you want to? What is it about that song which makes you want to cry, even though it seems the words have no relevance to your life at all?

I realise this is beginning to become quite a deep, intense piece of writing, and I would entirely understand if you felt the urge to stop reading, maybe it means nothing to you, just a passage of words all piled up into meaningless sentences, making no sense at all, and that is fine. But to those of you whom I have reached, in whatever way, whether it is just one sentence where I made you stop and think to yourself, ‘she’s right’ and realise you felt the same way I do. I applaud you, not me, you. For taking the time to tap into something, a feeling, a thought, anything, which may seem to be on a different ‘level’ to the ‘normal’ everyday life you lead.

Kayleigh x