Dear Katie, I have been with my man for almost three years now, but somehow I just can’t trust him at all. Whenever he doesn’t pick up his phone I start thinking he must be with another woman, and when he goes to work I get fearful of who he might meet there. I have often accused him of cheating and lying even though I know it’s highly unlikely, but how do I know he’s not screwing around behind my back and then lying about it to me? I have got depression and anxiety, am terrified of abandonment and I do not believe that I am attractive or interesting no matter what anyone says. I must be hell to live with. How do I start being fair to my guy and trusting him? Help! PLEASE!!!

Thanks

Emily

Katie Says

Hi Emily, to me, if theres no trust in a relationship, theres no relationship.

Your paranoia might just end this relationship, which im sure you dont want and you need to control it, which you know other wise you wouldn’t have written to me. If you actually believe he is cheating and he doesnt want you, then why are you still together? Because you dont truely believe he would do that to you and you know you have something to offer him. I used to think the same thing, until i realised that I was good enough and he would never hurt me.

You need to give yourself some more confidence, then you’ll realise what i realised, and your relationship will be perfect again.

Stop telling him what you think he’s doing, try not to call him so much and think positive thoughts about your relationship with your man. Negative thoughts will only make it worse, trust me.

To be fair to him, do the above, he’ll realise your trying and he’ll be happy, as well as you.

I hope that helps, good luck with your future, Katie x